How attachments keep you stuck.
Hi Thriver!
So we did a thing in August.
We dropped our youngest child off to college in a completely different state.
The hustle of organizing online orders to pick up there (highly recommend this tip for out-of-state move-ins) to checking our lists multiple times overshadowed the emotional process of what was actually happening.
Our family story book was turning a page.
Garayland (as one of our best friends calls our household) was entering a new chapter, the next chapter.
I do not like the term "empty nesting" because it creates an image in my mind of a cold abandoned forgotten space that is no longer suitable for living and feels like it implies that I have brought nothing to my nest to keep it warm, except my birdies.
That is simply not the case.
Yes, I have loved having my birdies here. But just like Mama birds everywhere, I have also brought so many strings, twigs and pieces of tinsel in to decorate our nest throughout the years that there is so much that remains in their departure. My birdies are launched but there is still so many pieces of string, twigs and tinsel here that they know they can come back for at any time and in the meantime I get to enjoy what I have built here too.
An important part of this next chapter process is recognizing all the feelings.
Recognizing that what we are feeling as this chapter closes is grief is so important/
I am here to normalize grief and all its accompanying feelings all at the same time:
If you are next chaptering, you can think of your newly launched birdie and...
Be happy for them.
Be excited for them
and grieve the chapter changing.
If you genuinely enjoyed your children, it's OK to feel sad that you miss them.
It means you did a great job parenting and they are people to miss.
Presuming your feelings are one dimensional keeps you stuck in the last life chapter. Honoring your feelings gives space for your to process your feelings and move you into the next chapter of your life.
The other night I was wrapping my day up, putting dishes in the dishwasher, wiping the counter and I looked at the clock as I have for years since my daughter started hanging out with friends in the evening. Without realizing it, I had a flashback feeling to the curfew clock check wondering when she would be home, only to remember she was at school and wouldn't be walking through the door anytime soon.
My heart sank for a moment and then as the Universe would have it, I came across this image.
And while this image is about death specifically, every life change create a layer of grief to be processed.
When we recognize this grief, we can begin to move forward through it and find ourselves on the other side prepared and ready to draw in incredible abundance into the next chapter.
Speaking of next chapters.....The Love.Heal.Thrive. podcast is back and we are diving into all of the above and more! Tomorrow, we are exploring our emotional attachments and what those look like as we move into a new chapter Be sure to subscribe today so that you can be alerted tomorrow when it drops.
Follow the Love.Heal.Thrive. Podcast HERE!
Much love,
Erin
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